November 29, 2006

Breaking: sanctimonious nutbar won't run
Outgoing Senate majority leader/douchebag Bill Frist flip-flops, says that he has decided not to run for president.

"In the Bible, God tells us for everything there is a season. He also mentioned I've been quite an asshat. So, at this point a return to private life will allow me to return to my professional roots as a healer, watch lots of video, and to refocus my creative energies on innovative solutions to seemingly insurmountable challenges Americans face," the prune-balled kitten-killer said.

- m

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