May 23, 2002

Trent "Hamster Hairpiece" Lott Loses Toupee in Hysterical Head Explosion when Senate MAJORITY Leader Daschle Trades in Pink Tutu for Burgundy

Under fire from republicans for questioning the administration's handling of pre-Sept. 11 intelligence data, Senate Majority Leader Thomas Daschle (D-S.D.) yesterday accused the White House of hoarding information and vowed to pursue an independent inquiry to investigate the matter.

"There is an increasing pattern that I find in this administration that reflects an unwillingness to share information not only with us but within their own administration," Daschle said during the question-and-answer period after delivering a speech to mark the first anniversary of Democrats seizing the Senate majority

"Despite what some in the administration have suggested, silence in the face of security lapses is not patriotism," Daschle said. "If anything it is the opposite. And the consequences of such silence can be devastating."

Still, Trent the Whining Hypocrite said Daschle needs to be careful not to be too critical of the Smirking Cokrmonkey "during wartime" and suggested such a tactic could "backfire on him."

He bleated, "When you go out there and start attacking the president, any President, people don't like it." - - -reported by Roll Call, with a straight face.

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